You meet L at Smart Alec’s on Telegraph. You haven’t seen her in years. Strange how she faded away after being roommates with you sophomore year at UCLA and now 3 years later, here you both are reconnecting in Berkeley. Something was in the air, It felt like many of your friends from UCLA were moving up to the Bay right after college.

Should you get a chicken sandwich? It was a gray and windy day in March, so you both decided to get something cozy, like the corn chowder with corn bread on the side.

L tells you that she started working at the Gates, which was this house of domination in the East Bay, where your mutual friend, Z, started working at just a few months ago but got fired from soon after.

How is it being a Dominatrix? I mean, what do you do with your clients?

It’s fun, she says, Like today I got to tie my sub up, put clothespins on his nipples, spanked him, pissed on him, then I put on a strap-on and fucked him in the ass.

What? Wow. Really? That was your day today? That’s so crazy.

Yeah. Oh hey, let me pay for this, she insisted as the total for our meal got rung up for $12. She pulled out of her wallet a hundred dollar bill.

Oh wow.

Oh yeah, she noticed you staring at her Benjamin, it’s kinda this new problem I have now. Since clients pay me in cash I have to break these hundred dollar bills at random places.

Wow. You think to yourself. You love that this is her new problem. And you also love that this is the story that she gets to tell when she talks about her day at the dungeon, like it’s another day at the office.¹on acid?

You want problems like that. You want to tell stories like that.

So wait, how did you get started at the Gates? Did you just go in for an interview?